Going back to work!

I had an interview a few weeks ago to go from being a sub to a full time para and I got the job and I will be working at Malie's old school, at the preschool. I am excited to bring in some extra money!! This means I will be taking another break from school again, but I would rather get us caught up on bills and even ahead. So since I start work soon and Malie starts school again soon we are trying to spend some more time together so we went to Lauritzen Gardens the other day so I could take some pictures and she could see the trains. Brittney and I put together her cop car so she could drive around in it. She does really good, it's funny to see her driving like adults do. She likes to park it and than back it up and turn around. Tremonti loves to follow her in it and he barks at it too. The weather has been so beautiful the past few days we haven't even had the air on, saving money!! So below are some pictures that I took from our day at the gardens. I let Malie run through one of their sprinklers that day so a couple of the pictures her shirt is wet. Hope you enjoy!

Butterflies and dragonflies

Photography and more

Okay so this blog may become more about photography and the pictures I take than talking about things, just because I seem to make more time to do stuff with pictures than I do with talking about what is going on in our lives. But this will still be a place to vent sometimes. So before I put up some pictures I'll talk about what I have been feeling lately. The funeral for my grandpa went as well as it could, it was hard. And when I look at a picture of him the way I remember him it makes my heart sting a bit. It was really nice seeing my family, I love and miss them so much. My cousin is going into Digital Photography and we were going to go take some pictures together but we ran out of time. So I am looking forward to doing that with her the next time we go up there! Other than that we have been just getting back to normal at home. There have been a few things I have been trying to work on and that is spending more time just playing with Malie and so far it has been good. I dedicate at least one hour to spending time with her doing what she wants to do ( within reason). She has been getting more than an hour for sure lately so its been great.

The other thing that I have been working on is being paranoid that the Cancer will come back. Anytime my hubby itches or sweats in the night the thought comes to my mind. And during my grandpa's funeral it was something that both of us could not take off our minds. I always feel like it is just around the corner waiting to pop up again. So I guess you just enjoy the time that you have because you never know if it will come back again. I sure hope not!!! But its there in the back of both our minds.

So onto some pictures that I have taken. Hope you enjoy, because I do!

It happend

I have been lucky in life to not really lose to many people in my family. But this past weekend what we knew would happen eventually did. My grandpa passed away on the last day of our family reunion. The day that everyone usually heads back home to their life's. He wanted to make it to the reunion to see the family and I am a little hurt that we could not be there. My sister in law had her wedding reception that we were happy to be a part of. He passed in his sleep early Sunday morning, he had been battling COPD for many years now and we all new that this day would come and I guess if it was going to happen it happened the best way it could have, surrounded by our family. I just wish I could have been there too. It is somewhat easy for me to be a bit detached right now, because I am not there with my family yet. They are all up in Minnesota right now and we are leaving in a couple days to be with them and say our goodbyes. I know when I see my mom that is going to be the hardest part. I melt like a little 5yr old girl in front of her. She cries I cry. We have always been close except for a few years. The past few days I have felt really tired and just want some quiet time, so I have found it hard to really be motivated to do anything, which makes me feel worse because I know malie wants to go do things and I just don't feel like it and I have barely any patience when I usually have a ton. It's probably normal I guess. So this is what is going on right now, just gonna get through this weekend which will be really hard, but I am looking forward to seeing my family.

My grandpa and Malie at last years family reunion.

Malie turned 5!

On Thursday my little roo turned 5 years old and soon she will be going to kindergarten and time is going to fly by, not that it already doesn't. We had a really great day on her birthday, one of the best. My dad took the day off and because we were going to dinner that night Josh had to go to sleep during the day so he could get up and go to dinner with us and than he had to go to work. So that day my dad came down for a breakfast with Malie of strawberry pancakes with cool whip, yummy! We opened presents and than we got ready to go down to Morrel Hall in Lincoln to see dinosaur bones! Malie's aunt Brittney came with us and on the way down we stopped at Red Lobster, one of Malie's favorite places to eat. My dad and I both don't like seafood so we went with some very yummy chicken, but Malie ate her shrimp in like 2 min! and than wanted more! So after lunch off we went to the museum.

Malie looks so small. Even a picture doesn't show how massive a mammoth was. Crazy! But after our trip to lincoln we had to head back and wake up josh to go to dinner at the Spaghetti Works in Ralston. Dinner was pretty good as you can see Malie got some ice cream for her birthday :)



Then on the way home we stopped down at the end of Mainstreet to see flooding from the Missouri River.

So we have been having a great summer so far. My sister in law leaves tomorrow to go to Jamaica and get married, I wish we could have gone too. But we are gonna send our love with them and we'll see them when they get back. So happy day to everyone! Hope you have a good week!

A day out with my love bug

I love having a day with my love bug just being out and about and yesterday we went to the Farmers Market. My dad was supposed to go with us but he ended up having to work :( So Malie and I went and got the oil changed in the car and than went downtown. I forgot that the Arts festival was going on so that was plus for us when we got there. We walked around for a bit and got a few things from the market and Malie got a spider painted on her face. She for some reason always wants things like that when it comes to face paint. I don't have a girly girl on my hands! Last weekend when we went to the farmers market I debated bringing my camera and decided not to and of course I get there and wish that I would have brought it. So this time I did and got a few pictures. I want to get some more the next time I go. After we spent a couple hours there we came home and Malie took a nap. Josh was at drill so when he got home we got ready and went to dinner with some family for his dads birthday. I love spending time with his family, but it makes me miss my own so much! Oh the other day I went down into our cellar to see if we got any water down there from the massive rain we got and there wasn't too much so that was good, but there was a massive spider. I couldn't kill myself too big! So yesterday josh went down there and took care of it after I took a couple pictures of it. When they are that big I just get scared. I'm a wuss. And on another note, but bestie is here now for a while for the summer with her two kiddos! I can't wait to spend some time with them. I miss them so much when they are in Texas. Hoping to see them in a couple days! Today I think is a movie day, it is Sunday and it's time to relax. I might do a little cleaning but well see! Have a good day!!!

Gentlemen singing in the Old Market

 Pretty Flowers!

 Sunset from the other night.

Malie's spider

My favorite one from the Arts festival.

Our giant spider that was in the cellar. Yuck!

Momma guilt..it sucks..

Again it has been awhile since I have written on here. I've been forgetting about it and have gotten kinda busy. School is out and that means that I am back to being a full time stay at home momma. Which I love, especially since once she starts school again time is just gonna fly by. But earlier this week she as a turd! Lying about the littlest things and not listening at all, and of course it leaves me feeling like I have been yelling and repeating myself all day long when at the start of the day I had great plans. Hence mommy guilt. It sucks. Plus I finally got my puppy! He is really cute, we drove down to the Lincoln Humane society to get him, they said he is a bluetick coonhound mix. We are pretty sure he is mixed with black lab because that is what he looks like. His name is tremonti, after josh's idol Mark Tremonti. He is actually pretty good pups so far, but like any new baby or puppy things have been a little more stressful and less sleep. He gets along well with our chloe pupper too. All in all things are going good though. On a more serious note.... My grandpa has had COPD for a long time now and is in the end stages, he is in hospice at home and it had been kind of an up and down experience. He will be doing fine and than wham! he isn't doing so great and we are deciding when to go up or if we should go up, because he could stabilize again. And so far that is the pattern, but his body is really starting to shut down more and more now. He sleeps more, eats less, and remembers less too due to the lack of oxygen. My dilema is when to go see him. I am worried about my mom, anytime anything happens she rushes up there, just in case it is the last time, and I know that one of these times it will be and she is going to be so hurt. My grandma has been by his side through literally thick and thin, married for 50+ years! What will she do when he is gone, I worry for her too. So I mostly worry for them. Every time lately when the phone rings I am afraid it will be my mom on the phone, and I always listen for what her voice sounds like, if she is crying or not. My job will be to take care of her, she is the one losing her dad. I will be sad and I am already, but I am more worried about my mom. Knowing this is coming has made me appreciate my own father a lot more. Every time he goes to leave from coming down to visit with us, I almost don't want him to go, because one day I won't have my dad anymore. So I think we are going to try to go see my grandpa in a couple of weeks. It's going to be hard, I just hope he can make it that long. But I know that if I don't get up there in time to see him before he passes that he knows that I love him and I know he loves me so I will be okay with it.

 Malie and Tremonit cuddling, he actual slept like this with her :)

 Flowers after a storm.

 Tremonti 9 weeks

Malie playing the endless game of malie putting chloe's ball in her bike and chloe chasing her around.